Poem – Smart casual

I won’t weep if I run my mouth for now

She goes to sleep, I’ll toss and turn for a few more hours

The planes sweep clouds, the ozone layer goes

The wind is colder, the tap water sour

A dose of London Victoriana – switch back to 7pm

‘I’ll be at the faltering fullback in half an hour’

She’s 24 – Jack Bauer

Off a student diet of apple sourz she’s moved on to Whisky Sour

Defensive with sporadic glancing cuts I’m a silver fox – David Gower

I’ve got a jacket and my thick frame specs duh duh duh duh duh – Austin Powers

I’ve got hayfever she’s an April Shower With a patterned shirt that’s crisp n fresh she she’s a model for hippy post flower I’ll call her a keeper – Manuel Neuer

(It might be Neuer if that’d annoyer)

We say we like the same bands, but I’m too agreeable to what I see in the dawn as 6music white power

We’ll go for a ride past the the pleasure beach if we stick to fair ground – Blackpool Tower

With a fixed stare and hissing eyes when we walk to hers she’s got the Harringey glower

You need that in London these days

The city boys on 40k the dealers with two pas selling to the hip kids on the minimum wage Who think their arts h latest craze, a prolonged gap year that never pays

For their parents it’s a moral maze – Jimi Hendrix, the manic depression in the purple haze

They’re now extras in my purple patch, my schoolmates are getting on the property ladder while I’m semi detached

The monologue hits at 4:30am

She said ‘Well I’m a feminist but Thatcher’s a cunt’

Everyone says they’re a feminist but Thatcher’s a cunt

I bet she retweets – James Blunt

She has the political insight of Forrest Gump

Her parents are socialists who wants to lock em up young

And really proud their daughter marched against Trump

She’s the ultimate shy Tory- hasn’t told herself yet

I kick myself out at 5am Robbie Williams – no regrets

I can get called a baby face and act like I’ve been shown up

I can smoke til there are lines on my face and act like I’m a grown up

I can say my friends abandoned me when they don’t pick the phone up

I can drink til I’m spitelling and claim I haven’t thrown up

I can go to a gym class twice and tell myself I’m toned up

I can slag off the industry because the game is sewn up, I can see a stage full of hacks then ask why I haven’t blown up

I can tell a stranger my life story

That doesn’t mean they’ll fix it

I can tell a stranger my life story

That doesn’t mean they’ll fix it

The best case scenario is that we’ll Mark and Brix it

I can tell another the next week

Take the details and remix it

I can tell another the next week

Remix it and take the details

I take it can tell the week

Remix details the next and another

So you’ve been on a weekend break to Lisbon?

Well, I’m at my parents in an upper class prison

With the diagnosis to play the victim

It was 42 degrees due to nuclear fission?

Well, I’m at my parents in an upper class prison

With the diagnosis to play the victim

A pre-millenial social schism

(Faster x 3)

When I was 15 I would count my steps from the bus stop to school

1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8

I got so sick of it I started to count the letters

abcdedghabcdefgh

Then I did both together 1a2b13m8h

Now I can say the alphabet backwards in 4 seconds

Zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedbca